Paradoxical Commandment #9

People really need help but may attack you if you do help them. Help people anyway.

I totally relate to this one. Independent person that I am, (I even added the word Independent to my business name) I have never been able to accept help easily. As far back as I can remember my mantra has always been, “I’d rather do it myself”. Besides, no one can do it better than me. :) Sound familiar?

We all need help at one time or another with decisions, moral dilemmas, coping and our lives. Nobody knows it all inasmuch as we would love to think we do. I have a sign in my office that states “I know it all – I just can’t remember it all at once.” I leave that sign there to remind me how silly it is to think I can do everything alone.

Another reason someone may not want to receive help is that they cannot face their inadequacies. This is called denial. I don’t know where or when, in our society, the seed got planted that it was cowardly to accept help but I think it takes courage to admit you are not a superman/woman and it’s OK.

What about the saying “You scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours”. Sometimes this is an unspoken motto among unscrupulous people. I have known people who have held grudges for years because their neighbor, friend, or relative did not reciprocate “favors”, therefore, they would never help anyone again unless they were assured the deed would be returned.

How can you determine if someone is in true need? People in need may be struggling with their pride or self-image. Sometimes it is hard to acknowledge that life just isn’t what it used to be. Think about the basics. People need food, clothing and shelter. They need friends. Don’t let their attacks toward you stop you because more often than not, they are not attacking you personally.

A statement from "Anyway" author Kent M. Keith says “Others have helped you over and over again. Now it’s your turn. Enjoy the deep meaning that comes from assisting others in appropriate ways and improving their quality of life.”

Write it down,
Carma

Chambers & Bloggers - A Good Mix

In my post Social Conversations, I compared blogging and social networking to chamber of commerce’s mixers. Let's take a look and find out how blogging/social networking stack up against an organization that has been around since the sixteenth century. I don’t think you can really compare the two entities fairly, however there is one important statement that fits both worlds.

The basic mission of a chamber is to create and promote a climate where business can operate in a productive and profitable manner.

Responsible bloggers do encourage and support a climate where writers, designers, copywriters, coaches and many more entrepreneurs can be productive and profitable. Instead of meeting face to face, we meet screen to screen providing factual information and motivation for learning. We are all citizens of this blogging community and communities are what their citizens make them.

Internet marketing has also made a huge impact on chambers of commerce. Click here to see a video of how this North Sacramento chamber markets to prospective new members via YouTube. Their energetic message, Lead, Serve, Inspire is riveting.

Entertainment is sometimes used to liven up a chamber mixer. Bloggers have access to all kinds of entertainment as well but this local chamber really knows how to get your blood pumping. Sign me up! I think the content of this conversation is self explanatory. Chambers of Commerce have joined the global bandwagon too.

I hope this helps those of you, (who are like me), to understand what people are talking about when they have conversations about conversation. The conversation is the glue that holds relationships together. I think I’m getting it now.

I highly recommend that you join your local chamber of commerce. All you need to do is spend a total of two hours a month handing out business cards and meeting other people who probably need your services.

Write it down,

Carma

Social Conversations

I have to come clean. I don’t know about you all but in my opinion if you blog, you are a social networker. Dawud Miracle’s post on social networking also got me thinking about this popular tendency to promote the art of Conversation. Social networking and conversation go hand in hand. Does that make sense to you?

I read a lot of posts talking about joining and promoting conversations and also how important conversations are to relationships. But I seem to have trouble finding out what the conversation is about because people are having a conversation about having conversations. To be perfectly honest here, there have been numerous times when I want to ask the question…What?

I know I am being a little “tongue-in-cheek” here but if I get confused then there must be thousands of others. Here is my analogy and how I understand the issue of Conversations and Social Networking as it relates to the blogosphere.

I belong to a chamber of commerce and go to the mixers. This is an activity that combines social interaction with business just like blogging does. Local chamber mixers are about business people social networking and blogging is about people social networking with business as the underlying interest.

I think places like My Space and Twitter should not be compared (if they have been) to social networking in regards to business. My daughter uses My Space to keep in touch with a lot of people and family members. These sites are for fun, a little diversion and much like an old fashion telephone party line.

This may sound simplistic to many of you but this is how I have been able to understand what people mean when they start talking about conversations and social networking. I was afraid I was doing this blogging thing all wrong because I didn’t know what the subject of the conversation was about. I would search for hours trying to find something to relate to and when I did, I posted faster than you could snap your fingers while twiddling your thumbs.

In my next post I would like to expand on the analogy between chamber of commerce mixers and blogging.

Write it down,
Carma

Paradoxical Commandment #8

What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. Build Anyway.

I find this commandment difficult to take in because it is so harsh. Nothing lasts forever. However, I believe that this commandment speaks to the act of building for that is what brings joy and satisfaction. Consider the sand castle. What is more temporary than that? In one day your castle complete with moat and tower is melted away with a miniature tidal wave. You knew this would happen but you built it anyway. Why?

Perhaps you were building for the joy of creating something with your family or friends. Perhaps you were building memories.

Are you building your business to last forever? Have you thought about that? What kind of legacy are you building or will your business die when you do?

When you develop something of substance or value, whether it be an organization of people or a building made of stone and glass, it is the intangible things that will be remembered long after.

I think Kent Keith explains this commandment perfectly when he says:

“Of course, it is gratifying when what you have built last far into the future. But don’t forgo building just because it may not last. The joy and meaning that come with building will last. They will be yours forever.”

Write it down,

Carma

Paradoxical Commandment #7

People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs.
Fight for a few underdogs anyway.

Do you enjoy cheering and helping the underdog?

Why?

If the underdog wins then YOU win, right? How many of us perceive ourselves as underdogs? You know who you are.

I realize that all underdog issues may not be right or important. There are risks for supporting underdogs. Also, the odds are always against the underdog and he/she is likely to lose whether they are right or not. Underdogs are Expected to lose. However, we love the underdog, but sadly, we don't jump on their bandwagon. We’ll go with the status quo, vote for the most popular, cheer for the winning team, we comply.

Remember the movie Rudy? Now that was an underdog movie. What about Invincible? Each of these movies gave me the warm fuzzies all over. However, there is one thing that comes to mind. I already knew the end. The underdog wins even though the expectations for losing are enormous. Realistically, it is hard to follow and help the underdog and more often than not, we don’t.

I like the way Kent Keith ends Commandment #7. “When you look back at the end of your life, you may conclude that fighting for a few underdogs was one of the most meaningful things you ever did.”

It takes courage to stand up for the underdog and it takes courage to believe in yourself when no one else will.

Write it down,
Carma

Are you Up for the Challenge?

SIXTH ANNUAL FUNDSFORWRITERS ESSAY CONTEST - SPONSORED BY NABBW.COM

FundsforWriters and the National Association of Baby Boomer Women announce the Annual FFW Essay Contest with the theme: Make Us Want to Be You! In 750 words or less, either send us a remarkable promotional plan for your writing project or tell us what you'd do with your writing career if you had a year to devote to your passion. As always with a FFW contest, you choose whether to pay a $5 entry fee or not. The first prize for the entry fee division is $200. The first prize for the non-entry fee division is $50. Deadline October 31, 2007. Winners announced December 1, 2007. Visit our sponsor at http://www.nabbw.com/. www.fundsforwriters.com/annualcontest.htm

Take a few minutes to look around Hope Clark's FundsforWriters. You will find a lot of good things going on.

Write it down,

Carma

Chicka Boomer, Chicka Boomer

According to many sources, Baby Boomers are a group of people who were born after WWII in countries having large spikes of births between the years 1946 to 1964. What about people like me...or you, who don't fit within that 18 year range? For goodness sakes, two of my children are Baby Boomers!!! (However, comparison between the two groups is another story for another time.)

Be truthful now, when you hear the word Baby Boomers, don't you think of people who were born in the 1940's, grew up in the 1950's early 1960's and were weaned on Rock 'N' Roll in its infancy? I do too.

Last year my local newspaper put out requests for Baby Boomer articles. I jumped at the opportunity to be able to share my experiences of growing up in a small Texas town during the age of innocence, when businesses where formed with a hand shake; kids addressed their parents Yes sir, and Yes Mam; when teachers spoke, kids listened; when putting peanuts in your Coke was daring and Coke was a soft drink.

Oh, so many other wonderful icons, like hula hoops, poodle skirts, James Dean, and of course Elvis and "I Like Ike" campaign slogans. I'm an expert. I was mesmerized each week watching The Dorsey Brothers Show and Hit Parade. That was our MTV, only it was live and performers wore clothes.

Imagine my dismay when I was rejected because I was too old!!! Doesn't experience count for anything anymore? Interestingly I found out that several companies and organizations are willing to proclaim me as a Baby Boomer, as long as I can afford the entry fee.

Write it down,

Carma